Originally Posted January 25, 2012
A mom I know at school told me this story today.
A warning to parents getting kids assessed and coded.
Sarah has two boys, her older son is now in grade five. The first three years of school were not great for him. He was easily bored, inattentive, fidgety - all the things lots of little boys do when in the-sit-still-and-listen environment. In grade three the teacher told the Sarah that Flynn needed an assessment.
Sarah explained that though her boy may not stare at her as she spoke, keep his desk clean and still perfectly still he was quite normal. After several meetings and more frustration the teacher finally said, just try it, give him one of the ADHD drugs for a month and see what happens.
Wow.
What is going on? Shouldn’t meds be a LAST resort?
So thankfully Sarah knew better and took the boy to her pediatrician who asked the obvious question: What qualifies this teacher to suggest you medicate your child?
She took Flynn for an assessment, paid the couple of grand for it only to find out he was ahead of his grade in all subjects but that he had dysgraphia, no need for a prescription but it explained a lot.
Sarah had been advised that she should give the school the file it would mean the boy would be coded and get extra help. He was coded, he did not get any significant extra help.
And now that diagnosis is in his file - forever - and here's what she didn't know: it limits Sarah’s future options as some schools and some programs will not admit kids with a learning disadvantage in one area, no matter how bright they are in others. It's kind of like trying to get an insurance policy with a pre-exisiting condition, no one will cover you.
Had she known what the possible drawbacks were to submitting for an IPP beforehand she would have chosen a different route.
We need ALL the information before we can make advised decisions about our kids.
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This can easily mislead parents. You should do more research before giving the impression that a code can somehow hurt the future of a child. It is simply not true and such assumptions are from uneducated sources.
ReplyDeleteThis is one parent's experience. And simply is true.
ReplyDeleteAll children learn differently and an IPP can be a godsend. No doubt about it.
However, the IPP she was advised to implement did not provide the promised resources/support and when she wanted to move the child to another school the code prohibited her son from attending that particular school.
Had she been given all the information at the outset; a code can provide resources but understand it stays in his file and may limit you in other areas - then she might have made the same decision or asked around, determined how much help coded children get at her school, other schools, schools in general and made a different decision.
In sharing their experiences parents give other parent's more nuggets of information to digest and file anyway they see fit.
Your comments are a welcome addition to the conversation (though I don't see why you would chose to do them anonymously) and if you have more you can add please do.
Many thanks,
Patti
Hello,
ReplyDeleteIt is me, the "anonymous" person.
First, I would like to say that I really enjoy your blog. I think it is a great idea, but I don't necessarily always agree how the information is shared. I am a parent who is currently going through the whole assessment, coding and IPP process. I have gone through the Child Development Centre at the Children's hospital, two private psychologists and my husband is a teacher at a private school in Calgary that specializes in working with kids with special needs. I read your post above and frankly, I fear that it gives the wrong impression of the whole process. This is why parents need to be careful of "playground" talk. Hearing another parent's experience, doesn't necessarily mean it is the truth. That parent may be confused or simply have the wrong information themselves.
But, before I share anymore opinions, I would like to explain first why I remain anonymous. I understand you might not take me seriously so I will explain.
I strongly believe in privacy. Although, sometimes I wonder if such a thing even exists anymore. If I were to post my name, I am therefore making public my own private experience and the experience of my child. It is the privacy of my child I would like to protect.
Take a look at the article below. I think it worth the read. The following stands out the most for me:
"On the most basic level, we want to be able to tell our story about our lives. But, in the case of our children, a permanent and public story has already been recorded about them before they have a chance to decide whether they want to participate or even whether the narrative is true to their own vision of self."
http://www.cnn.com/2012/05/25/opinion/sultan-miller-facebook-parenting
Once again, I really do enjoy your blog. I think you have the best intentions. This post on coding just bothered me a bit for so many reasons that I am happy to share if you are still interested.
Thanks!
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteHi again Anon,
ReplyDeleteThere will always be a lot of playground talk here as that's where moms talk. Whether or not the information they get from a teacher, doctor, administrator is true and right compared to what other's know to be true and right is not the issue for me.
The experience they had is the issue. So if they were misinformed they won't know that until someone reads their story and speaks up with their truth.
Then other folks see all sides and they are armed. Perhaps with incorrect information but that is how the conversation starts.
My daughter was told she could get pregnant from kissing. The myth comes home, is questioned and a discussion begins. She collects information and starts to file it, has it on hand, can ask for more or research herself to find the truth.
So please share your facts and add to the conversation.
While I understand you want to protect your child why not give yourself a name of some kind so I don't have to reply to "anonymous"
I come from 25 years in media, we never responded to someone with a compliant, comment, information who could't be bothered to put their name on it. I almost used that old filter in this instance and look what we would have missed. So give me a pen name.
Please write back with your story.
Patti