First Peek at the World of Grown Ups

Originally Posted February 2, 2012

Some moments in your childhood can be called up so clearly. One of my most vivid memories was on night when I was about 8 years old and I got to stay up late to watch a movie.

It was a weeknight and I was in my pajamas about to go to bed. I was sitting watching TV with my dad on one side of me, my mother on the other, when a commercial came on for the movie that was about to start. There was a whispered conversation behind and over my head. I caught words like “important”, “school”, “sleep in” and then my mom turned to me and said:

“Patti, there is an important movie coming on and your dad and I think you should stay up late to watch it. If you are too tired to go to school in the morning you can sleep in and go after lunch. I saw this movie in the theatre and I think you should watch it. I know you’ll have questions and I'll try to answer them for you during the commercials, okay”

So, feeling very grown up, I nodded and settled down to watch "To Kill a Mockingbird". I have visceral memories of that viewing; the feel of my mom’s warm hand in mine, my thinking Scout was a great name and being terrified of the dogs and of Boo ... but more than anything I recall the reaction I had when my mother explained to me about the inequality of men based on skin colour. I was far too big a concept for me to grasp. I knew people I didn’t like, there was a boy on the block who tried to join my freckles with a pen, but the notion of people being hated for their colour made no sense. Watching Atticus fight for Tom Robinson I was aware that Scout and I were having the same education, the same reactions and crying the same tears.

It took me along time to fall asleep that night. My mom and I had talked a lot about the movie and I remember asking if she had ever felt meanness for someone because they looked different. I was pretty sure she hadn’t but there was a part of me that wondered if that kind of meanness was something we might grow up to feel. I cannot recall my mother's exact words but she explained that people are fearful they make bad decisions and that oftentimes their fear is misplaced.

I admire my parents for allowing that evening to happen. It’s hard to know when certain ideas - good or bad - should be permitted to infiltrate the innocence of childhood. Having become a parent myself I look back and I realize my mother’s approach was fairly consistent throughout the years - she knew that it was always best to hear about, learn about, talk about all the big things at home first. I don’t recall ever being presented with a situation from being offered my first joint to being offered my first promise of love when I didn’t have a discussion from home that I could call up and review.

I am trying to do the same with my children and I hope it pays off like it did for me. I always had My Mother's Perspective in my pocket and even when I did not heed her advice it was invaluable to have on hand. (turns out she was always right, it took years to learn that!)

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In 2006, British librarians ranked “To Kill a Mockingbird” ahead of The Bible as one book "every adult should read before they die".

This year the book turns 50 and Mary Badham, who played Scout, has been in the press with her memories of the film. Here is one of those interviews. 

click here  Enjoy.